nursing or not

Oh boy! the challenges I am going through. I thought I wanted to major in nursing. It just seems so cool to become a nurse and I had big plans for my family. But lastnite I really got to thinking, "is nursing REALLY for me?" Can I actually become a nurse and get a job? How well will I do in clinicals?

First of all, I am disabled, and it is known that most people frown on that. I have heard stories where some nurses had to hide their disability from their employers just to get a nursing position. The problem with that is that in some people its more evident and their employers find out eventually. By law it is illegal to let employees go on the basis of their race, disability, or background. But I think in nursing, a nurse with disabilities may not be able to perform certain aspects of the job and they often get fired. I do believe it is unfair, but thats society and the way it thinks. Plus employers are usually not trained to provide accommodations for those who do have disabilities and many of them do not want to go through all the trouble of getting accommodations. Its sad.

IMO, clinicals may be very hard for me. You have to be able to make decisions very quickly. That is the biggest weakness of all. I can make decisions, but not in that short of time. I have to be able to think, but in a matter of life and death, thats not good and I dont want anybody to die because of me. That will make me drop out of the nursing trade once and for all.

Second of all, you have to be a people person. You have to know how to talk to them. And even if you are trying to be nice to the patient, they may take that offensively. I am not sure how to handle that. It is just best that if you are not a people person, nursing is not the best profession for you.

So I have been kicking around a bit and I decided to major in microbiology and become a lab technician at a hospital. I have always been fascinated with germs and how they cause diseases. It would be so cool. I'm still going to Bozeman. The 4-year schools in this state are always located in high crime communities much like they are in California. I feel safer in Montana, much like it is here, but without the ocean.

So thats my plan. I love nursing, but it may not be for me, plus I hate the site of red stuff and people throwing up makes me sick. I have a weak belly. Microbiology is the way to go. Maybe one day, I will come up with a more affective way to cure cancer, who knows.